Well, two blogs in two days...must be a record for me! Thanks to all of you for your support with the sister drama...what a wonderful feeling to log in to my account and have encouragement waiting for me. Thanks so much.
Today was the most blah of days with the weather here in Houston down right yucky. Luckily, my little squirt and I were able to play and watch a lot of Sesame Street. Ok, we went to Taco Bell for lunch and it only cost $6.54, but I figured out how next time we can share less for about $4.50 ;-) We also went and looked at the baby furniture that my sister-in-law just put together for her little bundle soon to be making his/her debut. Luckily, I am so thankful to have her within the in-law crowd. We get along great and she always makes me smile. Love you Aunt Melissa.
Does anyone know where we can get the swine flu vaccine? Good gracious...trying to hunt it down! I hope you are all happy and healthy this week! Happy end to this dreary Monday, but so thankful Claire and I had a PJ day!
luv,
k
Monday, October 26, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Sisters
I have come to realize that the relationship between sisters is one of a complicated nature. This relationship spans love, jealousy, pride, jealousy, anger, jealousy, and judgement...oh, and love.
I have this dream you see...a dream where my sister and I are best friends. I have had this dream for many years and it eludes me still. We are about as different as two people can get, with the only similarities causing us to clash like the Titans. Don't get me wrong...I love her and she loves me and if we were either in a life or death situation, the other would be there to save. With that said, we find ourselves on the opposite ends of a wide spectrum.
I am rather plump...she is stick thin. I have blonde straight hair...she has long curly dark hair. She loves running...I hate running. She loves Coach...I love Ross. She loves high heels...I love my Crocs. I love being Spring trash...she is an Inner Looper. I am emotional and an over-pleaser...she is emotional and has no need to please at all. She has her Masters in Business...I have my bachelor's in Psychology. She studied...I didn't. I need her...she doesn't need me.
Fortunately, to my 6 followers...she has never looked at my blog that I'm aware of, so my confessions will not be heard. If by chance they are...maybe it will help us. Even though I am the big sister, I feel like I'm always trying to live up to her. I'm always trying to make her proud of me, to no avail. And what is so funny is that I am so very proud of her. She is a strong, independent, and opinionated woman that has made a successful life for herself. I have told her many times how proud I am of her. I have never heard those words directed at me.
Excuse the pity-party. I hope some of you understand what I'm going through. I'm going to try and pray for us to "find" each other. I think I need to let go that constant strive to exceed her expectations because I probably won't even meet them. I need to be happy with my own accomplishments and feel self-satisfaction in my attributes. I should not worry about what other people think...even my sister.
So, I call out to you to tell me that I'm not crazy. That sisters are complicated...not just for me and mine. Take care this Sunday. I pray for a wonderful week for all of us! Apologies for my lack of blogging...will try and be better.
k
I have this dream you see...a dream where my sister and I are best friends. I have had this dream for many years and it eludes me still. We are about as different as two people can get, with the only similarities causing us to clash like the Titans. Don't get me wrong...I love her and she loves me and if we were either in a life or death situation, the other would be there to save. With that said, we find ourselves on the opposite ends of a wide spectrum.
I am rather plump...she is stick thin. I have blonde straight hair...she has long curly dark hair. She loves running...I hate running. She loves Coach...I love Ross. She loves high heels...I love my Crocs. I love being Spring trash...she is an Inner Looper. I am emotional and an over-pleaser...she is emotional and has no need to please at all. She has her Masters in Business...I have my bachelor's in Psychology. She studied...I didn't. I need her...she doesn't need me.
Fortunately, to my 6 followers...she has never looked at my blog that I'm aware of, so my confessions will not be heard. If by chance they are...maybe it will help us. Even though I am the big sister, I feel like I'm always trying to live up to her. I'm always trying to make her proud of me, to no avail. And what is so funny is that I am so very proud of her. She is a strong, independent, and opinionated woman that has made a successful life for herself. I have told her many times how proud I am of her. I have never heard those words directed at me.
Excuse the pity-party. I hope some of you understand what I'm going through. I'm going to try and pray for us to "find" each other. I think I need to let go that constant strive to exceed her expectations because I probably won't even meet them. I need to be happy with my own accomplishments and feel self-satisfaction in my attributes. I should not worry about what other people think...even my sister.
So, I call out to you to tell me that I'm not crazy. That sisters are complicated...not just for me and mine. Take care this Sunday. I pray for a wonderful week for all of us! Apologies for my lack of blogging...will try and be better.
k
Monday, October 12, 2009
Sleep atrophy and other tales...
Dearest Readers,
How I have let you down. Thankfully, there are only a hand-ful of you to mingle. I am quite rightly embarrassed at my lack of blogging, but haven't had much notion to do so. Life is just not that interesting at the moment. Tonight, for example, after my Mom has made me believe that if I don't get more sleep that I'm going to die of the swine flu...I have chosen the lesser evil of going to bed early. (No, I don't yet have the swine flu). Lights were out last night at 8:15pm. Tonight it was 9:20pm, but then after the dogs woke me up twice...I am here.
Claire has been ill with a cold for a couple of weeks, was well one week, and then with "hand, foot, and mouth" disease the last week. Yuck, right? Really wasn't a big deal though and she has been fine for days. Today, I really did nothing...did dishes, did my husbands expenses for him (for selfish reasons, I assure you), played with Claire, argued about family plans for Thanksgiving, etc.
I have been contemplating a new "story" to render, but will keep it stewing for awhile. Saturday night, I went to a truly "fancy" surprise party and it was wonderful! I got to really talk with some of my new friends and see how I can still have fun after 8pm. I paid for it the next morning when Daniel was slow to rise with Claire and I ended up with her at 4:45am. Tonight, we began the process of pushing her bedtime, so that I don't die of swine flu and that maybe we could go out to dinner with our little babushka sometime! I'm hoping that we can get her to sleep until 6am...that would be heaven.
I guess that is it for now kids. Night.
k
How I have let you down. Thankfully, there are only a hand-ful of you to mingle. I am quite rightly embarrassed at my lack of blogging, but haven't had much notion to do so. Life is just not that interesting at the moment. Tonight, for example, after my Mom has made me believe that if I don't get more sleep that I'm going to die of the swine flu...I have chosen the lesser evil of going to bed early. (No, I don't yet have the swine flu). Lights were out last night at 8:15pm. Tonight it was 9:20pm, but then after the dogs woke me up twice...I am here.
Claire has been ill with a cold for a couple of weeks, was well one week, and then with "hand, foot, and mouth" disease the last week. Yuck, right? Really wasn't a big deal though and she has been fine for days. Today, I really did nothing...did dishes, did my husbands expenses for him (for selfish reasons, I assure you), played with Claire, argued about family plans for Thanksgiving, etc.
I have been contemplating a new "story" to render, but will keep it stewing for awhile. Saturday night, I went to a truly "fancy" surprise party and it was wonderful! I got to really talk with some of my new friends and see how I can still have fun after 8pm. I paid for it the next morning when Daniel was slow to rise with Claire and I ended up with her at 4:45am. Tonight, we began the process of pushing her bedtime, so that I don't die of swine flu and that maybe we could go out to dinner with our little babushka sometime! I'm hoping that we can get her to sleep until 6am...that would be heaven.
I guess that is it for now kids. Night.
k
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
One of those days...
How interesting that some days you just need to cry. You know what I mean? Brush teeth, shower, cry, eat lunch, etc. You actually realize that a good cry will help things. Everything is always brighter with Claire...she is so funny and sweet and tender. So, that helped. But then we met our good friends Melissa and Avery for some good Mexican food and girl talk and that made things all the better. Thanks Mel and Avery! Off to watch some "So You Think You Can Dance"!!
k
k
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Sunday Drive
Dear Friends,
I just walked in the door from what was intended to be a nice and cheap family outing. Now, I must blog about it in order not to cry at the humanity of it all. As previously discussed, Daniel and I are trying to live off of mostly nothing to get some stupid stuff paid off. We have been locked in the house since yesterday as we all have a cold and don't want to expose anyone else. But, we were feeling a little cabin fever and thought we would go out for ice cream. This is cheap, right?
$7.89 to be exact for a large fry, large Diet Coke, small Frosty and medium Frosty. We pulled into a parking space and Daniel crawled in the back to share with Claire. She is a Smyth and we love our french fries and frosties! We are enjoying the moment of bottled air, but the beauty of a dreary day. Finally, I decided I wanted to head on home. We were at the Wendy's on Louetta and for any of you who live near...this is a big mess with them working on the road and intersection. I should have known.
I waited for an open space, to turn right. I was EVEN TURNING RIGHT! When I actually needed to go left in order to avoid the drama of turning left without a light. I waited for a large opening and pulled out. About five seconds later, and it was a long five seconds...I see a large SUV coming close to slamming into the back of me as her horn was blaring.
I was sure I had given myself plenty of room. I was sure that there were two lanes. Daniel says I was in the "right". But, honestly...that was beside the point.
As the SUV swerves into the left lane...horn still blaring...I turn and look. A harsh-looking woman in the driver's seat is leaning over the man in the passenger seat and I hear her scream through my closed window..."F$#@ing Idiot!!!" with her middle finger proudly unrolled with a fierceness at the end of her arm that I have never seen. Claire was still enjoying her Frosty in the backseat.
My afternoon outing with my family took a very sad turn. Something like that really gets to me. I try to quiet my mind and tell myself that maybe she was having a bad day. Maybe she is a bad person. Maybe she will get what's coming to her. Daniel and I talked about the fact that this would be a "teaching" moment if Claire had been older.
At what point do we get that angry? Even if I pulled out in front her... At what point is it ok for us to completely denigrate our fellow man. It makes me sad in that moment...what world have I brought my daughter into? I know there is good...I have so many friends and family that prove that to me everyday. But, what if that disappointment of a woman was Claire's teacher or coach someday? I hope that she realized what she did was wrong. But, somehow I think not. I'm better now.
I got it out. God grant me the strength to finish the evening off joyfully.
k
I just walked in the door from what was intended to be a nice and cheap family outing. Now, I must blog about it in order not to cry at the humanity of it all. As previously discussed, Daniel and I are trying to live off of mostly nothing to get some stupid stuff paid off. We have been locked in the house since yesterday as we all have a cold and don't want to expose anyone else. But, we were feeling a little cabin fever and thought we would go out for ice cream. This is cheap, right?
$7.89 to be exact for a large fry, large Diet Coke, small Frosty and medium Frosty. We pulled into a parking space and Daniel crawled in the back to share with Claire. She is a Smyth and we love our french fries and frosties! We are enjoying the moment of bottled air, but the beauty of a dreary day. Finally, I decided I wanted to head on home. We were at the Wendy's on Louetta and for any of you who live near...this is a big mess with them working on the road and intersection. I should have known.
I waited for an open space, to turn right. I was EVEN TURNING RIGHT! When I actually needed to go left in order to avoid the drama of turning left without a light. I waited for a large opening and pulled out. About five seconds later, and it was a long five seconds...I see a large SUV coming close to slamming into the back of me as her horn was blaring.
I was sure I had given myself plenty of room. I was sure that there were two lanes. Daniel says I was in the "right". But, honestly...that was beside the point.
As the SUV swerves into the left lane...horn still blaring...I turn and look. A harsh-looking woman in the driver's seat is leaning over the man in the passenger seat and I hear her scream through my closed window..."F$#@ing Idiot!!!" with her middle finger proudly unrolled with a fierceness at the end of her arm that I have never seen. Claire was still enjoying her Frosty in the backseat.
My afternoon outing with my family took a very sad turn. Something like that really gets to me. I try to quiet my mind and tell myself that maybe she was having a bad day. Maybe she is a bad person. Maybe she will get what's coming to her. Daniel and I talked about the fact that this would be a "teaching" moment if Claire had been older.
At what point do we get that angry? Even if I pulled out in front her... At what point is it ok for us to completely denigrate our fellow man. It makes me sad in that moment...what world have I brought my daughter into? I know there is good...I have so many friends and family that prove that to me everyday. But, what if that disappointment of a woman was Claire's teacher or coach someday? I hope that she realized what she did was wrong. But, somehow I think not. I'm better now.
I got it out. God grant me the strength to finish the evening off joyfully.
k
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Bin of Doom
I wonder how many of you have some piece of furniture, tub, treadmill that you refer to in your home as "______ of doom"? This place offers a safe haven to any and all collections of stuff that we have yet to find a place for or are too lazy to put it there. We have "bins of doom" in my home. I feel like it is a step up from using the treadmill as the dungeon because then there is at least the perception that I actually use the treadmill for some sort of exercise. That perception is lost when you see the thick layer of dust and dog hair that covers it.
Well, this afternoon I felt called to begin the task of disseminating the junk that has piled up in the bin of doom on the chair in my room. This certain bin of doom has been eating up the "lost" for approximately six months. I had pretty much decided to throw a lampshade on top and call it decoration. Anyway, I told Daniel yesterday that September was going to be "organization" month for us. Surprisingly, I began the task today around 4:30pm at Claire's "witching hour", but it worked out well since she helped me empty the bin of its prisoners.
Thusly...(not sure if I used that correctly) I have finished 98% of the job of finding homes for the wayward inhabitants of our bin of doom. Daniel got home tonight and gladly decided to help me make labels for files that needed to be created. I have attached a picture of his dutiful work. I feel jazzed that this large task is down to about a 45 minute closer project tomorrow. Weird how that is.
k
Today
So, Claire went down for a nap...I now can write. She goes to MDO for the second time today and I am diligently contemplating how I'm going to spend my time while she is gone. I feel the need to keep busy because I'm still not entirely comfortable without her for so long. So, my options thus far are to lay around the house, sew, run errands, or go to lunch and a movie with my Mom. The last idea sounds the best to me, but that would require moo-lah! Daniel and I have put ourselves on a very strict budget to pay some stuff off, so I'm down to $4 "fun" money, but I have some things to return at Jo-Ann's for approximately $15 which would cover the movie. Or so I justify... But, the idea of napping, watching my DVR shows or even reading sounds remarkably pleasant as well.
My problem is that each moment is precious...this seems to be a constant theme these days with me. So, laying around sleeping is fabulous, but what if that is precious time I could be spending with my Mom? I can sleep when I'm dead...right? Or, quite practically...I should be sleeping right now instead of blogging. Unfortunately, I love to write and had hoped to write everyday. Not happening. I guess I need to stop worrying about how I will spend my time and just spend it. I hope all of you readers out there (like all 4 of you ;-) have a wonderful day and don't waste your time worrying or planning too much. Just get out there and live life...I mean...I can get 3 bean burritos at Taco Bell for $4!
k
My problem is that each moment is precious...this seems to be a constant theme these days with me. So, laying around sleeping is fabulous, but what if that is precious time I could be spending with my Mom? I can sleep when I'm dead...right? Or, quite practically...I should be sleeping right now instead of blogging. Unfortunately, I love to write and had hoped to write everyday. Not happening. I guess I need to stop worrying about how I will spend my time and just spend it. I hope all of you readers out there (like all 4 of you ;-) have a wonderful day and don't waste your time worrying or planning too much. Just get out there and live life...I mean...I can get 3 bean burritos at Taco Bell for $4!
k
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